In “Other Women,” by CaseyPlett, Mark aplogizes to Sophie for the bag of Old Dutch Ketchup chips. Sophie tells him he’s nice. Once she sits up, she drinks the large tumbler of ice water he provided. He announces he’ll get her more. After laying back down, she thanks him when he returns with a refilled glass.
Sophie reflects on how she and Tyler used to stick fingers in each other’s ears in choir class. She asks Megan how Tyler or the rest will react to her. Megan tells her they were kind of amgry when she sent her coming out email.
In “How Old Are You Anyway?,” Lisa reflects that when Natalie used to sit on her in the mornings, it wasn’t a prelude to sex, but something else. When Natalie would press her lips on her face, Lisa would arch her back and tilt her head up. Lisa opens her eyes to see an empty ceiling.
In “How to Stay Friends,” Minerva’s friend likes Thai. Minerva gets a table and orders the second-cheapest bottle of win. It’s been six months since they last met.
In “Portland, Oregon,” Adrienne hears a car chug-start outside. When the water runs hot enough, she throws her blankets in the corner. It’s her day off from her regular job.”
In the news, a federal judge’s order prohibiting government agents from making indiscriminate immigration-related stops was lifted by the Supreme Court on Monday. Justice Sonia Sotomayer dissented “rather than stand[ing] idly by while our consitutional freedoms are lost. Los Angeles Mayor Karen Bass said in a statement, “I want the entire nation to hear me when I say this isn’t just an attack on the people of Los Angeles, this is an attack on every person in every city in this country.”
Wednesday, I had my follow up with my new primary care physician. When I showed him my blood pressure chart, he said that everything seems normal, and he doesn’t need me to take my blood pressure daily anymore. I have been meditating once or twice a day before and while taking my blood pressure. The meditation has been helpful, and he suggested increasing my meditation time; so today I set my meditation timer for four minutes, and will continue to do it twice daily when I can.
While I was waiting to see the doctor, news started coming out about the murder of Charlie Kirk. The Democratic party decided to postpone the Central Committee meeting in Salt Lake City that evening for fear of retaliation. We felt it was better to err on the side of caution.
As I expected, Donald Trump and his cronies are trying to blame the Democratic party as having somehow organized an assassination. Nothing could be further from the truth. Many of us are grieving the unnecessary use of violence, no one that I know is celebrating his death, and from what I have heard, it was likely a single individual acting alone.
This is hard to deal with. Two issues come to the forefront of my mind. The first thought is that it was too easy for this individual to perform this deed. Anxiety and open carry do not mix well. It is like a powder keg just waiting to go off. At film festivals and other events, there is a no weapons policy required to enter the event with checkpoints on the outside guaranteeing compliance.
When people feel like they are under attack, they are likely to do something rash before they give in to a sense of helplessness. Nobody wants to feel helpless. We don’t need firearms at any rally, and we don’t need the inflammatory rhetoric. We also we need to invest in mental health.
My mind goes back to the school shootings, like the one that happened Tuesday. So many times a person that decides to lean into violence, especially mass violence, has unresolved issues that they need help with. By not having mental health counselors in schools, or allowing our teachers to refer students to counseling and/or treatment as necessary, this will allow unresolved conditions to fester. If we truly believed in the safety of our children, we would get all guns out of school, and have all children, teens, and young adults assigned a counselor as a resource for whenever they need one.
Some people carry firearms in order to feel safe. The issue is that what is making them feel unsafe is the fact that other people carry, and we are not able to trust one another. I bought a knife and brought to junior high with me because another boy showed me his switch blade. I carried it to feel safe. Anxiety and paranoia don’t belong in our schools, and neither do weapons. We need safe spaces where weapons and firearms are prohibited and enforced. Then we need to be able to sit down and really listen to one another.
Before I left the doctor’s office, he checked my receding abscess which is nearly gone, and ordered four samples of blood for testing, and the tetanus, bacterial pneumonia, and shingles vaccines. He also started the process for me to order my next colonoscopy.
I went out for my role playing game Wednesday night. We had a great time, and afterwards it felt really good sitting outside in wicker chairs at the outdoor wicker tables. The soft breeze felt so refreshing as we talked about the game, and about ourselves. There is nothing like the therapy of good friends.
Thursday through Saturday were a struggle. The vaccines sapped my energy, my arms were sore, and it was hard to focus. I had to take time off in the morning to take a nap, and then again just after work. Even with that, I made good progress on my AI effort. I was able to file a claim and write the logic upload the claim attachments. We had a brief conversation with the engineering team at UPS Capitol about the API, and later that same afternoon, I discovered a bug in the API while uploading the attachments. Hopefully, I’ll hear from them soon, and be able to continue with the development effort.
Friday night, I watched the latest Superman movie with my neighbor. Since I was still recovering from the vaccines, she picked up food from Texas Roadhouse, while I selected and paid for the movie. It was an interesting take on an old favorite. Lex Luthor’s pocket universe was definitely a new spin, as well as Superman taking abuse from the community when they turn on him. I don’t know what people were complaining about. I loved Krypto, and his playfulness and his faithfulness. This is how pets behave when they are loved, cared for, and not abused.
Charlie Kirk has been almost non-stop in my feeds. So is the fact that he said deaths by gun violence were the price of the Second Amendment. He reasoned that the second amendment was put in place to protect the people from tyranny. Yet, he espoused ideas that were authoritarian in the extreme and actually advocated for tyranny. In one particular “debate,” it was not a debate at all, as he kept interrupting the person who was debating him, devolving into personal attacks. That’s a form of verbal violence meant to shut down opposing opinions, not a debate.
The Second Amendment has roots in slavery. Note that the amendment has a reference that it is necessary “in order to maintain a well-regulated militia.” In the Jamaica of the 18th century, every non-black male was required to register with the militia. In the event there was a slave uprising, or a slave tried to escape or was being punished, the militia was pressed into service. The militias would also fight in regional conflicts, and were responsible for protecting public order. While militias were used to fight the British invasion in latter 18th century, their original purpose was not to fight tyranny, but rather as a local police force or guard. In addition, the weapons of the time took signifcant amounts of time to be reloaded between shots, were costly, and were not as accurate as today’s weapons. Hence, the need to be able to secure what they had in case they were needed to protect the peace, not for recreational use, especially should the decide to go to war against the indigenous community or other militias.
I think what is missed most frequently here is the phrase “well-regulated militia.” This in itself implies that firearms should be controlled and only used where deemed necessary. Hunting with firearms itself would have probably been allowed, as many of the people in controll loved to hunt. Of course, they would probably question the “sport” of hunting with semi-automatic weapons.
While I am certainly not an advocate for solving issues with violence, Charlie Kirk seems to have reaped what he sowed, gotten what he gave. The rhetoric of political violence did not begin with, nor will it end with him. That rhetoric has been spewing out of the lips of our commander-in-chief, and too many times it has taken heart in someone to be acted on. The ultimate reason for the murder has not been revealed, but people who have glanced at his profile, have noted that the murderer is a Trump supporter that disagreed with Charlie Kirk.
I grieve murderous actions; I grieve the fact that it seems okay to advocate for political violence and then act on it; I grieve the fact that so many people, students especially, had to bear witness to such a tragic event; I grieve the fact that we can’t seem to have an honest conversation where we all listen to one another; I grieve that human beings are not treated with the dignity and respect they deserve; but I do not grieve that a voice of hatred and bigotry has been slienced. I grieve the murder, but I don’t grieve for Charlie Kirk.
This also has me thinking about Heaven and Hell, if there is an afterlife. Universalists don’t believe there is a hell, as no loving God could create one. But if there is a Heaven, how could people who have been harmed be kept separate from those who harmed them, because if it were not possible, wouldn’t it certainly be Hell in Heaven?
In moments of violence and loss, we are reminded of how fragile our sense of safety truly is—and how urgently we need to reclaim it together. The answer is not more weapons, fear, or divisive rhetoric, but more compassion, care, and connection. True strength comes when communities choose to protect one another by creating safe spaces, investing in mental health, and ensuring that every voice is heard with dignity. We can grieve without glorifying hatred, and we can honor life by refusing to surrender to cycles of violence. Let us commit to building a future where safety is not found in weapons, but in trust, healing, and the courage to see one another’s humanity.
